This will be our last Sunday Story before the holiday break, and this one is based on a session we developed in the summer of 2020. It's called The Adventure Mindset, and it's all about the attitude we bring to the adventures we choose (and especially the ones we do not).
The Adventure Mindset is all about fostering an attitude of resiliency, adaptability, and improvisiation. It brings incredible benefits to a leader's mental health during disruptive or difficult times, and by extension it brings the same benefit to those around you. As you'll see in our white paper (coming soon! Register for our newsletter to be the first to get a copy), we think there's some disruption ahead so this series feels timely.
The Adventure Mindset consists of mastering 5 components, and over the next few weeks (after a short holiday break) we'll bring you one per week.
Master your Stories: Your stories create your reality, and you are your most important audience.
Don't try to choose the adventure: Things are going to happen, and you can't choose them. But you can choose your attitude.
Embrace solutions, not problems: Problems don't advance the adventure - but solutions do!
Lean into discomfort - lean, don't leap, into growth and new experiences.
Balance is Everything - Life is going to happen anyway whether you stay balanced on the ride or not!
Master your Stories
As we've already spoken about elsewhere, storytelling is fundamentally human and it's one of the activities our species has been in engaging in for a really long time (60,000 years at least!). Storytelling, at it's core, is the art of sharing an experience with someone who was not present for the experience. Seems rather simple, right?
And yet, storytelling is full of complexity. How you tell the story - your tone, your framing, and what details you deem important - are critical. The same story told a different way can leave the listener with profoundly different impressions of what happened. Here's an example.
I've written about the Jordanian part of my around-the-world adventure before, but this time let me tell you about Egypt. I had just landed after some wonderful experiences in Rome, and I hadn't even made it through customs yet. For that, I would need a visa. A visa I did not have. But not to worry, I figured. I could probably get one at the airport, right? I went through the airport experience, the warm air and heat from the new nation already palpable even inside. After a few twists and turns and hallways,I realized I was approaching the desks where the visas were purchased. Only I had a problem - when it became my turn, I found out that the attendants were only authorized to accept payment in cash - not credit - and yours truly was lacking any cash at all, and the nearest place to get cash was on the other side of the customs gates, which I couldn't get through without the aforementioned precious visa.
The First Version
I was panicked. I didn't know what to do - how could I have been so foolish. I was in ottawa a few months before and went by the Egyptian embassy, but befause I didn't have an appointment I wasn't able to meet with anyone there to get the visas required. My travel guide said I could get one in person but it was foolish to not double check the process, because my mistake and negligence has now ruined my trip since I'm not able to get into Egypt.
The Second Version
I was panicked. I didn't know what to do - it was pretty foolish of me to not double check visa requirements but it was too late for that now. I had a problem to solve - I needed £20 to buy my visa, and I was exactly £20 short of that goal. But I did have a $125 watch on my wrist, so surely someone needed a timepiece at a discount. So I started asking. I went through the line asking if anyone wanted to buy my watch - the fact that I was asking for the exact amount of a visa made my predicament clear - and before long a British gentleman took me up on my offer. We exchanged money for watch, I bought my visa, and I was ready to see the pyramids.
Both of those stories are the exact same scenario - but the second one is what actually happened. I knew I wanted to see Egypt, and I was on an adventure; when I encountered this hiccup with the visas, I thought "Well, what's the story I want to tell later? That I gave up, or that I tried to fix the problem?" Every decision we make is writing our story, and we might not even be telling that story to anyone but ourselves - but remember what I said earlier? Stories are about sharing an experience, and the way we tell them changes how the story is percieved. This is true for ourselves, too. By focusing on making good decisions that aligned with the adventure I was on, I naturally got the boost of energy and courage I needed to try to sell my used watch to a stranger - and it worked.
If you find yourself in hardship, and you are telling yourself or others a story about how things didn't aren't working out, odds are good you'll make that story come true. But if you can master your story - not to the point of being untruthful, but in the tone, attitude, and details you choose to focuse on -- you will find it not only motivating you towards a solution, but it will be encouraging those around you too. And the best way to master your stories is to treat everything like an adventure. You might not have chosen the adventure, but the adventure chose you, and one day you will be telling this story around a boardroom table or campfire or living room. Which story do you want to tell then? Write that one as you live it with your attitude, choices, and what you tell yourself matters most about your experience.
Incidentally, once I got past customs I went to the ATM and found the British person at the baggage claim, asking to buy my watch back. "Sure" he said. "$200". The look on my face got the laugh he intended, and I then knew he was joking and he gave me the watch back for the initially traded sum, but had he not - well, that's the nature of an adventure! You never know how the details are going to go, and you can't choose them - but that's for the next post.
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